Hot Eyes Lol

Wow!!! Though it and not a female thing, but I from it would not refuse! :-)

Maybach Brabus SV 12

When I look into your eyes...

Your memoey treasured in my heart
I can feel your breath, on the skin on my face
You don't know what you mean to me
but I don't need to show
how it suppose to be
I jus want to wishper some words
which I never tell you,
but you've ever heard

I loved you from the bottom of my heart
Not a single thing can make us apart
I jus do whatever says my heart
Let me jus hold you in mine in the dark
as its true love in my heart

When I think of you,
My heart-beats goes so fast
When I look into your eyes,
I feel your blushing art

I jus need to be so quite sometime
or I need to be loud at times,
I dont know what to do, where n' why
When I look into your eyes...

Ha!! That's Great!!!

It has been known for many years that sex is good exercise, but until recently nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after original and proprietary research they are proud to present the results.

REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................... 187 Calories

OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories

PUTTING ON A PROPHYLACTIC:
With an erection....................... 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories

PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris............ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories

POSITIONS:
Missionary............................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................ 326 Calories
Italian chandelier..................... 912 Calories

ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories

POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately......816 Calories

GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years old........................ 36 Calories
30-39 years............................ 80 Calories
40-49 years............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years............................ 2916 Calories
70 and over......................... Results are still pending

DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door.... 3521 Calories

Parents of twins, triplets and quadruplets provide support through their shared experience

After a while, Stacia Schwarz got used to the stares, the comments from curious strangers and the occasional yell of "double trouble."

Ever since her identical twin daughters were born, her double stroller has become a magnet for attention. The twins are 3 years old now, and Schwarz has heard it all.

"I had one lady tell me the other day, 'I'm glad it's you and not me,' and I told her, 'Well, I'm glad it's me, too,' " said Schwarz, who lives in Overland Park.

Even though many mothers would not understand what it's like to have more than one baby at a time, Schwarz has a network of friends whose experiences are similar to hers. She's a member of Johnson County Mothers of Multiples -- parents of twins, triplets and even quadruplets who lend each other support, advice and secondhand baby supplies.

"It's just a great way to meet other people and families that you can bounce things off of and kind of figure out what you're doing when you're not sure what you're doing," said Marsha Golladay of Lenexa, a founder of the group.

The group got its start in 1998 after eight women branched off from the mother of multiples support group at Shawnee Mission Medical Center. The hospital group was primarily focused on infants, but the children of those moms were getting older.

Johnson County Mothers of Multiples grew by word of mouth and at the group's garage sales, where they recruited new members.

"We have just steadily gained momentum until the group now has close to 300 members, the sum of which includes twin and triplet moms and even a couple who have quads," said Golladay, whose fraternal twin girls are 11.

As the group grew, so did the garage sales. Every fall and spring, the group hosts a sale at a local church featuring items from 32 families.

"There's a tremendous amount of things because you figure everyone has two, three, four of everything," said Debbie Harris, who has 4-year-old fraternal twin boys. "When it's time to move on, you really just want to move on and clear everything out of your house."

Much of the parental interaction happens online at the group's message board at www.jcmoms.com. It allows bedridden moms-to-be and parents juggling babies on different schedules to chat anytime.

"The truth of the matter is, it's great to be surrounded by people who know exactly what you're going through and have figured out shortcuts or tricks of the trade," said Harris, of Overland Park.

The group meets offline, as well as at play sessions at Gymboree and parks. Members also coordinate a moms' night out, where the moms can enjoy a break and dinner with adults.

"None of us have known each other that long, but when you all have twins or triplets, we seem to bond really quickly," said Mo Edwards of Overland Park, the mother of 3-year-old identical twin boys.

They share advice, such as keeping charts to track feeding and changing, whether to put the babies in the same crib and how to manage 2-year-olds who haven't learned to share.

It's often more challenging to care for two babies than one, but Jessica Peters of Lenexa sees benefits now that her 3-year-old daughters are getting older.

"They're each other's companion, and now they can just play together," Peters said.

By: Uhlmansiek, Laura, Kansas City Star, The (MO), Aug 21, 2006

Favorite miracle max!

By moosesgomoo22

Wives of British Sasians Dumped

LONDON: Dozens of South Asian women have claimed their husbands have tried to get rid of them by duping them into travelling from Britain to the subcontinent and then abandoning them.

Lawyers and charities have taken up cases in which Pakistani, Indian and Bangladeshi women claim to have been tricked into giving up their passports and tickets, making it harder for them to re-enter Britain and rejoin their British-born children.

Experts say unscrupulous British South Asian men are using the ploy to avoid costly divorces and deny their wives the rights they have in Britain.

Anne-Marie Hutchinson, a lawyer at a London family law firm, said she had encountered 20 cases in the past 18 months involving wives born on the subcontinent and married to British South Asians, in which the wives had turned to British courts to try to gain custody of their children.

Ms Hutchinson said the racket was comparable to cases in which husbands fled abroad, taking the children with them.

``You could say it's abduction by a different means -- you take her away rather than the kids. It's a breach of human rights, forcibly separating a mother from her children.''

In May, a 22-year-old Indian-born wife of a British-born South Asian man told the High Court her husband's parents had lured her to India and abandoned her without a passport to cut her off from her baby daughter, who remained in Britain with her husband.

The man's parents had told the wife, who cannot be named for legal reasons, that her father was ill, but when she reached India she found him well and surprised by her visit.

The parents-in-law, after dropping the wife off with her relatives, flew back to Britain without telling her, leaving her without her passport, which they had always kept in their possession. The husband's family then claimed the wife had deserted her husband and child.

At a hearing on the case, the judge said: ``I am satisfied ... the father's family conspired and contrived to remove the mother from their family to India and to abandon her there and to keep her baby daughter for themselves. They have presented a thoroughly dishonest case to this court.''

Meena Patel, a worker at the charity Southall Black Sisters in west London, said cases were now coming to light because increased use of emails in Pakistan had made it easier for abandoned wives to make contact with charities and lawyers.

In many cases the wives are able to return to Britain, but often after long delays.

A spokesman for the Foreign Office said cases of spouse abandonment in South Asia appeared to be on the rise, with 45 cases in the past year, in one of which a man was duped.

Source: Australian, The, AUG 22, 2006

U.S. Male. Lol!!!!

By Sander van Bussel

Grandpa

A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall.

He approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I've lost my grandpa"

The cop asked, "What's he like?"

The little boy replied, "Jack Daniels and women with big tits."

Already Whole

God save me
For my soul plunges
Without my permission.
I fell in love
With my distorted reflection;
Everything I’m not,
All that I need.

You make my heart beat
You make my heart break
For you, I’d make it stop.
That’s what my god will do
When I show my face,
Damnation for adoration,
Hardly a fair exchange.

How can you ask this of me
When another shares your blood,
Split down the middle
Sixty – forty.
I can’t risk it all
When you’re fractured.

I stagger, cough,
Choke.
I carry my life in my hands
Bleeding, beating, ripped
From my body.
I lay my love before you,
But you
You brought a lock of hair,
An eyelash, two,
Expendable.

Is that what I am?
I brought what you are;
My love, my life.
And you shuffle your feet
Look around coyly,
Pretend not to feel
The hot professions below you.

I’m your weeknight whore.
But I answer the call
Drive the distance
Every time.

I ache to spend every clock stroke
In your bed
Curled next to you
Just to breathe your air.
I have found my other half
But you’re already whole.

© j. Thompson

Ali's Review: Heart of the Woolf

Heart of the Woolf

By: Kai Andersen

Published by: Loose Id

Length: Eight Inches. Read this story and you'll understand ;-) 142 pgs.

Ali's Report Card: A+



Adrienne Lee can no longer contain her carnal fantasies for her boss, Jake Woolf, behind her cool facade. And it's getting harder for Jake to hide his growing arousal for Adrienne, as well. Especially, when you add to the fact that he's and empath werewolf, and can both sense and smell her arousal. But is he ready for another relationship after the last time?
When working together on a project, Jake comes over to Adrienne's house and feeds more than her appetite for food. And while Adrienne doesn't mind sharing her body and bed with Jake, she'll have a harder time sharing her heart. Afterall, how will Jake handle it when he finds out she's into menage-a-trois?
When it becomes evident that someone is out to get her, Adrienne will question the loyalties of those she trust. Everyone around her seems to be hiding something, even her new bedmate.
Heart of the Woolf by Kai Andersen is a great suspenseful erotic romance. From the beginning of the story, it is filled with hot sex and chemistry between Jake and Adrienne. Jake is an alpha werewolf and because of his empath werewolf, has a kind heart. Right away his protective instincts kick in when he sees that Adrienne is in trouble. What more could a female ask for than a man who can read your thoughts and desires?
Adrienne isn't one to ask for help lightly. She's very strong and capable of taking care of herself, but realizes when to accept a helping hand. Especially when that hand belongs to Jake Woolf. Adrienne's fantasies liven this story up as you read about the predicament she's in when she starts to mix reality with fantasy.
The suspense in this story is edge of your seat. Just when you think you know who the bad guys are, Kai has found a way to change things up. Her writing leaves your heart pounding in the action scenes, both the sexy and suspensful ones. This story is the perfect mix of action, suspense and erotic romance.
And you'll just love how Jake deals with Adrienne's sexual need and the creative way he brings it to their bedroom. Oh, the ideas you'll get from this story, trust me they're good.
I have found another writer to add my list of authors to bug with my e-mails. Kai better be ready for me to start begging for her next Woolf story, as I'm sure you'll want to after you finish reading this story.
You can learn more about Kai Andersen and her stories at www.kai-andersen.com
Next from Kai will be Mine Over Matter, a release coming from Samhain Publishing, in November.

Good Joke

A little boy and his grandfather are raking leaves in the yard. The little boy sees an earthworm trying to get back into its hole. He says, “Grandpa, I bet I can put that worm back in that hole.” The grandfather replies, “I’ll bet you five dollars you can’t. It’s too wiggly and limp to put back in that little hole.” The little boy runs into the house and comes back out with a can of hair spray. He sprays the worm until it is straight and stiff as a board. Then he stuffs the worm back into the hole. The grandfather hands the little boy five dollars, grabs the hair spray and runs into the house. Thirty minutes later, the grandfather comes back out and hands the little boy another five dollars. The little boy says, “Grandpa, you already gave me five dollars.” The grandfather replies, “I know. That’s from your grandma.”

Must Read

This incident happened recently in North Texas.

A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the refrigerator of the boat. On Monday she was taken to the hospital and placed in the Intensive Care Unit. She died on Wednesday.

The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis. This was traced to the can of coke she drank from, not using a glass. Tests showed that the can was infected by dried rat urine and hence the disease Leptospirosis.

Rat urine contains toxic and deathly substances. It is highly recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of soda cans before drinking out of them The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported straight to the shops without being cleaned.

A study at NYCU showed that the tops of soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i.e).. full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water before putting them to the mouth to avoid any kind of fatal accident.

Please forward this message to all the people you care about.
(I JUST DID)